Anonymous Story: A Plane Crash

Where so i start? My life has been more like a plane crash over and over. I’ve lived a whole life but I’m only 20 years old. I suppose I’ll starte at the beginning. The plane crash that started it all, when I was nine I was raped by 7 monsters, I was only 9. I can still hear their heavy breath on my neck the huge hands holding me down. I still have nightmares sometimes knowing they’re still out there. My second plane crash hit home My father left when I was 10 he left my mother for another lady two towns over. I went to therapy daily for two years. I met my fiance when I was 12. He was sweet handsome a gentleman at first. He was my third plane crash. His family was well off more than well off his family owned more than half of downtown. Many considered me lucky or a gold digger. his father owns a construction company. My fiance is semi driver. Not only that he’s a mule he imports narcotics. Most of which their fortune is based on. I had no idea what I had got myself into. I was blinded by what I thought was love. Now that I think of it he’s 8 years older than me I was 12 and he was 20. I couldn’t have sexual relations with him because of my past. We were still together dating I suppose. Then there where a series of plane crashes that occurred the day before I turn 15 I found out that my fiance my boyfriend at the time was having a baby a baby boy. I honestly didn’t know how to react part of me wanted to cry the other part wanted to kill him. But I was so deeply blinded by his charm. He convinced me that it was my fault for not letting him be with me intimately. A year later I decided to finally be with him. So we were and it was terrible I had flashbacks I started to cry and try to take him off for me but he didn’t he wouldn’t and when he was done he turned around I fell asleep. About 8 months later I got pregnant I also have found out that he had another girl pregnant at the same time but he paid her to get an abortion. I was 4 months pregnant I felt like I was drowning I was scared of him I was scared of what would happen if I try to leave them scared with how was going to manage with a baby on the way. I remember he had to go all dressed up to go out with his friends and we had a garden tool argument or he pushed me and I tripped over the table and I fell on the floor. He ran over and help me up The fall didn’t hurt fact that you did it hurt. He left anyway I went to bed didn’t think much of it until I woke up an hour later with excruciating pain picked up the covers there was a river of blood. I’m trying to get up my legs would it work. I reached over for my phone to call my fiance he didn’t answer so I called the neighbor him and I we’re good friends. He came into the house picked me up and took me to the hospital all I remember is him carrying me in there and asking me what happened and I blacked out. As I woke up I could hear my neighbor talking to the nurses mumble. I open my eyes confuse in pain I looked over at him couldn’t give me a straight face and I know I had lost my baby. I was in the hospital or a week and a half the day I was going home is the day my fiance went to see me. I told him I had lost the baby he cried and blamed me. So I blame me too. Everything after that my relationship with my fiance has been a lie we don’t love each other anymore we can’t even be in the same room. I tried leaving him he threatened me and the guy I was talking to he put them in the hospital. So I didn’t try leaving him anymore. Up until 6 month a go I met this amazing man. He started going to my job at a convenience store. When I first told him it was as if Cupid Had hit me. My co-worker and I Girl Talk about him. His smile was captivating every time he would go I couldn’t take my eyes off him period I had never felt that way before. Slowly we started speaking more and more every day he would go. I would get off work at 2 in the morning he would stay there and wait for me just to talk. But he wasn’t from the same town he lives 2 hours away the company he worked for send them to my town. We slowly started catching feelings for each other my coworker and told me to go for a my fiance was never going to find out because he was gone three weeks out of the month. So I went for it I slept with that guy. right after that he confesse to me that’s he was married and had two kids. The day after that he had to go back to his town because the job was done. But he had came back and I don’t know what came over me I didn’t mean to but we were intimate again and again and again. We started going on dates. We could talk for hours interest looking at him would bring a smile to my face. And every time he would leave my heart that’s when I realized I was in love with someone else’s husband and I was going to get married in three months. So I told him we couldn’t see each other anymore I didn’t want to be the reason why he wasn’t with his children. Be the reason why his wife hates him. You told me he loved me but he was always going to be there for his children but him and his wife haven’t been on the same page for years. That he didn’t know how this what we had happened how it got this far how he felt that he couldn’t live without me and he didn’t to live without me. I honestly felt the same way but it was wrong I we couldn’t do that to his family. I couldn’t back out of my wedding and he couldn’t back out his family so I ended it with tears in my eyes and a broken heart I told him we can’t see each other anymore. The day after that I woke up sick to my stomach throwing up that’s when I realized my period hasn’t came in two months. Me and my fiance haven’t been intimate in seven months. I took a home pregnancy test I took 7 they all came out positive. I went to the doctor just so he could confirm that I’m pregnant. I’m 2 months 2 weeks pregnant I the man I love and told my fiance yesterday he broke 2 Doors and my phone the TV yield until he couldn’t yell anymore the wedding still on I’m still pregnant except I’m according to him the trash now. I pushed away the only good thing that has happened to me I don’t know if it was the right thing or the wrong thing all I know is that I love him and Im having a baby and them getting married in 3 months.