Anonymous Story: Raped in my Sleep by my High School Sweetheart

I was 17- I’m 24 now.We had been together for about a year and sexually active for about 6 months. My parents were out of town and I invited my boyfriend at the time over. We watched a couple movies, chatted, & went to sleep. At some point during the night, I don’t know what time it was, I became aware of a grunting noise in the room and sweat dripping on my body. It didn’t take me long to realize what was going on. My boyfriend was having sex with me. I definitely didn’t say yes-(I was unconscious, sleeping) but I didn’t say no either.I wanted to but couldn’t-I was awake enough to be aware what was going on but not enough to do anything about it. He went back to sleep when he was done. We never talked about it-we continued dating for another year. I didn’t know it was rape until recently. It was just an awful image that stuck inside my head- something I tried to ignore. I succeeded in forgetting for a while – I didn’t remember until last year. I now have a million questions that I can’t answer. I’m trying to remember more but can’t.I feel like it that shouldn’t bother me after all this time but I also feel like it’s not bothering me enough.