Blue’s Story

The first time it happened I was 5 and she was 10,before I started school. I was eager to learn new things,so when my sister said she would teach me something new I jumped at the idea and closed our bedroom door. She said she was teaching me how to please a man. I had no idea what she was making me do. To this day my sister is still pretty…hands on but I try to keep my distance. She’s married and has a little girl now.

The second time was my stepbrother that I used to love with all my heart. We would play and spend almost every minute together. I looked up to him and he was my idol until that one night our parents left us alone. He called me to his room and confessed his feelings to me. It didn’t feel right so I tried to leave but he pulled me back into bed and raped me. He cried and held me after,begging for me to forgive him and not to tell mom and dad. I said I forgave him and wouldn’t tell,but I wish I told someone. Anyone. He had been sexually abusing his three youngest cousins before I came along,the oldest being 8 and the youngest 4. When I came along he let his two high school friends take the girls to separate rooms while my brother took me to another. This continued for 6 months until my mother drained our stepdad of money and took me back home only to take me back to them for another 3 months. I was only 9 and he was 15. I felt responsible for those girls and my best friend who was charmed by him. I could’ve helped them all but I was too scared to speak up,I thought no one would believe me. I thought since he always said he was sorry it would be wrong to ruin his football scholarship and to make him lose his girlfriend. Sorry that this seemed long,I just had this bottled up for years. Thank you for letting me share my story.

Author

WYR

WYR

When You're Ready.org is a community for survivors of sexual violence to share their stories.

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