Anonymous Story: Finding a way to move on

I was a Sophomore in college and it was first semester. I am now a 5th year college student because I almost failed out of school the year of my assult due to psychological issues from the assult.

I had just gotten home to my apartment by a sober driver for a fraternity. I had three other roommates, but I was the first one home because it was a weekend night. I ate a bowl of ramen noodles, watched a few episodes of Dawson’s Creek, and then headed to bed. I had been drinking at a party but wanted to go home while I could still find a free ride.

I laid in bed and fell asleep quickly while watching tv. I woke up, groggy, a few hours later to a stabbing pain in my vagina. The room was dark and I then realized a man was on top of me, making out with me, and fingering me with multiple finger. I was tired and cloudy, but I could feel the pain of him shoving his fingers in and out. My first instinct was to look at everything about him because I knew I was being raped. Once I got my hands over my chest, I pushed him up off me. I then saw this was a man I knew. I met him early in high school and at the time I would have called him a friend. I was confused why he was in my house, in my bed, and on top of me. I then pushed him all the way off me onto the bed, he lay there not speaking a word to me, just sitting. I tried to get up to walk out of the room. Not speaking a word, just trying to get away. I quickly realized that while I was sleeping he had taken my covers off my bed and placed them on the floor at the end of the bed. Also while I was sleeping, he had taken my shorts and underwear I was wearing and they were now around my ankles.

I pulled up my pants and walked out of my bedroom downstairs. My roommate was laying on the couch, awake, watching tv. She told me that she brought him over because he needed a ride home. I told her what happened and then prayed for tomorrow. I told my friends and guy friends the next day and people were mad but didn’t do anything about it. Within a couple days, everyone had forgotten what happened and he spoke to me as if nothing happened because we were in the same friend group. Sadly, I realized that no one cared what happened to me. I felt lost, lonely, dirty, angry, like really, really angry. I write this to find a way to move on.