Isadora’s Story: How my sexual abuser reminds me of Trump

Isadora’s Story: How my sexual abuser reminds me of Trump

I’ve been sexually assaulted twice. Once by someone I knew well and had to see over and over again, and once by a stranger who I probably wouldn’t be able to pick out of a line up. As I was living in Japan for the past 3 years, both were not American, and neither instance was in America. Writing about this is a big deal because after the first time especially, I told no one and did not fully understand that what had happened had been sexual assault. Since both times I was extremely drunk, I started to and still do, have an irrational fear every time I am very drunk that it will happen again.

I have no idea what type of personality the second assistant has, or the type of things he says (pretty sure he doesn’t speak English). But, Trump’s “just kiss. Don’t wait” guy talk shit or whatever we want to call it is a REAL problem and a REAL attitude men have. I can draw a direct parallel with my first experience. All through being touched inappropriately in ways I did NOT want, did NOT consent to, and was physically struggling to get away from, I was told over and over “I told you I fancied you, just give me one kiss, just one kiss, come on.”

He apologized a day later, and in confusion I said it was okay and we remained amiable. It was not okay (I struggle the most with this part of the whole ordeal, that I ever made it “seem ok”, but in the words of Anita Hill when she was under attack for continuing to work for a man who sexually harassed her: “I can’t explain it but it is NORMAL for victims to do this”). I saw him at a social function a few months later joking about “taking his dick out” because a woman next to him on the train was making noises he thought were sexual sounding. I called him disgusting, to which he FLIPPED out violently saying “I’m going to fucking kill you cunt.” He then proceeded to get me fired from a private English teaching job he had a connection to, and block me on every social media connection. I guess he did not want to have to see a woman who rejected his advances. This reaction to rejection sound familiar? (Trump)

I think about this and I worry for my host sister who will turn 5 in March and is the most precious little girl to me. It’s not okay. There are men out there, WORLDWIDE, who think women ALWAYS want their sexual attention and that’s all we live for. That we don’t have other important purposes for existing. Trump reaffirms this for them, and it is a disgusting thing to watch. If you are also a woman whose been sexually assaulted, or just a woman, I am sorry for you that you also have to be subject to seeing him on every TV program, and on every newspaper cover everyday.

Author

WYR

WYR

When You're Ready.org is a community for survivors of sexual violence to share their stories.

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