Dalas’ Story: It Happened More Than Once

Dalas’ Story: It Happened More Than Once

I was a rape victim for 4 years for two different people, here is my story.

When I was 10 years old my mom had a good friend named P., who was like an aunt to my younger sister and I and like a sister to my mom so we called her auntie P., P. had an oldest son named A. and a younger daughter named L. who we called our cousins.

P. developed drug and alcohol problems after her husband C. died in 2009. Every night her and A. would fight. Eventually in 2011 Child Services got involved and A. was put into foster care, because my mom and P. were really good friends, my mom decided to become A.’s legal guardian and have him come live with us. A. was 15 and I was 10.

After living with us for a few months, A. started becoming “comfortable” with me. I would stay up late at night because I had/have sleep insomnia and he would stay up to keep me company. One night we decided to play Truth or Dare, it was all going well until he dared me to kiss him. I didn’t want to but he peer-pressured me and he forced his lips onto mine.

For a week he would catch me every night when I was going to bed and force me to kiss him. There was no way for me avoid him because to get to my room I would have to pass his. After a week of him kissing me it evolved drastically.

He began to touch me in inappropriate places, (let me remind you I’m still 10 at this time). He would put his hands down my pants, and it only got worse from here. Then it got to him rubbing and humping the outside of my vagina with his dick until one fateful night when he penetrated me.

For 4 years this went on till the month of my 14th birthday. Every night for those 4 years he would abuse and rape me, He would hit me, choke me, burn me with cigarettes, and threaten me with weapons. For those 4 years he never wore a condom, I had multiple pregnancies that all ended in miscarriages because of him beating me.

In those years I developed serious depression. I would take apart my shaving razors and use the blades to cut my wrists, I would use a lighter to heat up pieces of metal and brand my legs. I thought that if I damaged my body and made it ugly then he wouldn’t find me attractive and he would stop.

When that didn’t work I became suicidal. I would go around people’s houses grabbing handfuls of random pills until I had 10 large Ziploc bags full of pills. Every time I would take a shower I would take many handfuls and I would wash them down with a bottle of bleach, but it never killed me. Then one time I took a whole bottle of sleeping pills and for the whole night my heart kept jump starting itself. Also because of A. I became an Androphobic.

In all of those years I never told anyone what was going on because I was afraid that they wouldn’t believe me or they would blame it on me. I was also afraid that if I didn’t do what he said or if I stopped him he would go after my little sister who is 6 years younger than me.

The only reason the abuse and rape stopped was because on the night of July 31st/morning of August 1st, 2015 my mom came upstairs, peaked into A.’s room, and saw him raping me. Later that morning my mom came into my room, told me what she saw, and I confessed everything that he had done to me. That Sunday my mom told my dad and A. got kicked out of our house. The next month in early September we made a rape charge, and I am currently going to court and he is being charged with Criminal Sexual Conduct in the 1st degree.

Now onto the second person…

A few months after the things with A. had stopped I started to become social again.

I was 14 at the time and I had met this guy, who was 17, through some friends. I enjoyed talking to him and we grew close but I only viewed him as a friend while he wanted more.

Numerous times he had asked me out but I always turned him down because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship. One day he messaged me that he was in town and asked me to hang out, so I told my dad that I forgot something at school and I met the guy in the town cemetery.

After a while of talking and laughing he offered me a pop and I gladly accepted and took it because I was thirsty. After a few sips I began to feel funny, my body locked up and I couldn’t move. I had realized that he had drugged me.

As I was fully conscious and unable to move, I watched him put on a condom and proceed to rape me. In my mind I screamed out for help. As he finished the drugs began to wear off, I watched him take off the broken condom and throw it in the woods. I went home and acted like nothing happened. Later that night I messaged him and asked him why he did it and he said that he was desperate to lose his virginity.

2 weeks later my period never came, I went to the person I trusted the most and asked him to buy me a test. He bought me a test and the next time I went to his house I tested and it came out positive. I took a picture on Snapchat, sent it to my rapist and told him I was pregnant, he told me to kill it because he wasn’t ready to be a father and if his parents found out he would get kicked out and become homeless, but I told him no because I’m highly against abortion.

When I told my mom I was pregnant, I never told her I was raped, I made up a story, I told everyone “after A., I wanted to see if sex with consent felt different”. Now I am 15, pregnant, due in December 2016, and my rapist has nothing to do with my daughter.

 

Author

WYR

WYR

When You're Ready.org is a community for survivors of sexual violence to share their stories.

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