I walked home tonight. Alone and late. I know I know what an incredibly irresponsible thing to do. Then the anger the rage of my fear, my politeness, and my rape bubbled that shit would not be contained. Walked for over a mile grunting and yelling and realizing that shit that had been deposited in my soul. I was downtown with shiny lights and nobody said anything. Liberating. I yelled louder and louder, I seethed and screamed and raged. That’s right back the fuck up. I want more I want to yell louder I want to lose my voice, what’s a woman without loss? I want all of that shit that buried embedded shit; let it out. All of it, I can’t carry it I have too much of everything to much potential to much love too much bullshit. I am so sick of this. Fuck it, I need a place a spot where this bullshit this misogynistic vice can be left in an empty place one that swallows everything a fucking black hole. Let me yell let me fight let me fail. Let me release this. Let me grovel punch and growl. Let me hate let me, love. Let me live. Why the fuck do you think they made the woman the mothers?