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Sep 25

Anonymous Story

I found myself in a similar situation. I started dating a new guy who I knew back from my high school but was never friends with. We started dating 7 months after I was raped by my ex. (Which I recently shared what happened on this site) When I told him about what happened he was very supportive and told me that he’d never force meinto something. A month after we were dating my boyfriend and i were kissing and fooling around with our clothes on. Suddenly his hand reached down and I asked what he was doing. He said nothing. We went back to kissing and his hand reached down again. I asked again and he said the same thing nothing. He reached again but still kept the answer as nothing when I questioned him. I figured he was just adjusting himself to be more comfortable. After a while he stopped and he admitted he to pulling his penis out and trying to slip it in. I remember saying isn’t that rape. But he never responded and desperate to get control back I decided I’d consent and he put it in but I jumped up crying before we could really do anything. Seeing how the people behind WYR responded to my first post which was similar to this it gave me courage to ask my boyfriend about what had happened. He told me that because I was fooling around that meant I automatically consented to sex. I told him that I never gave him to put himself inside me when he first tried. I don’t know how I could get into a similar situation. It starting to feel as if its me. As if I somehow do something to allow this to happen. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust any guy again.

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When You're Ready.org is a community for survivors of sexual violence to share their stories.

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